Supermarket Sweep
Have you ever walked into a supermarket and completely forgotten what you went in for? I thought that stuff like that only happened to old people but, alas, no. I needed bread and milk but I brought two cheesecakes and a bottle of Bacardi. I almost brought two-for-one Pringles as well but there was an obese person blocking the aisle. I took it as a warning.
I hate supermarkets and other places where you find a lot of people aimlessly milling around, getting in your way. I'm a food shopping warrior, in and out as fast as possible with a take no prisoners attitude. This usually means I have nothing in my cupboards that I actually want to eat because I grabbed the nearest and cheapest produce. And I always get the checkout boy that's high on drugs so instead of swishing my food through he slams it at the scanner and then grins at me. We often see him out on Friday nights, break dancing and starting fights.
If I take over the world, supermarkets are getting abolished and everyone can go back to buying their bananas from the friendly local grocer. I know it's less convenient but I won't care; I'll be in charge of the world so I'll have people to do my shopping for me.
3 comments:
"Have you ever walked into a supermarket and completely forgotten what you went in for?"
Oh yea, all too often. I always wrote it off to doddering old age, but if it's happening to young 'uns like you, then perhaps it's caused by something else... like maybe the horrid florescent light fixtures in supermarkets are emitting nasty memory-zapping rays... yea, that's it. ;)
Yea and you come home with junk like candy and microwave food. I would probably buy a bottle of bacardi too if we in Sweden wouldn't have to go to another store for that. I'm too lazy :)
but if it's happening to young 'uns like you, then perhaps it's caused by something else...
Preservatives. They are the evil of our times. Someone pass the disodium EDTA, will ya?
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